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| Ladies and Gentlemen, I present, the tantrum. |
Children bite. They claw and kick and scream. They express their anger in primal ways. Truthfully, being a mother is like being the alpha of a wolf pack.
Now, I adore being a nurturer to my children. I love cuddling them, singing them lullabies, and kissing away boo-boos. I dance "silly" with them in the living room to movie credits. I occasionally make up outlandish stories to explain how they are perfectly safe from any spooky shadows in their closet.
That being said, I'm well aware that I've signed up to be alpha of a wolf pack; a ravenous, cutthroat wolf pack with an unruly brood of eager young pups jonesing for leadership. In this pack (aka family) we support each other and stand by each other. I teach my children to survive and skills that will make them stronger. I do this because, fact is, life is going to be rough sometimes and mommy wolf will not always be around. (I'm alpha, not immortal for crying out loud!)
Quite frankly, if I didn't have what it takes to be in charge of my young pups, I'd be setting them up for failure and creating a lifetime of disorder for my pack.
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| WHAT DO YOU MEAN I CAN'T HAVE THAT BRIGHTLY PACKAGED, BRILLIANTLY PLACED CANDY BAR?! In the presense of these Wal Mart shoppers, I officially challenge you for alpha, Mother! Prepare yourself! |
You see, frequently, as alpha, I'm sneak-attack challenged by one of my young charges. There is usually very little warning; sometimes the form of said challenge arises in an embarrassing scene played out in the grocery story where my child is morphed into a human tornado of arms and limbs kicking and screaming, a nice side show distraction in the otherwise boring checkout lane. Other times the challenge is subtle but crafty; my little girl folds her arms boldly across her chest, glares at me with wrath, and states "no" or simply ignores what she's being told to do.
Whatever method this brilliant young usurper uses, the challenge is the same, "Are you really in charge Mommy?" And, "Prove it!"
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| And here, folks, we have the tantrum played out in living color. |
See, the interesting thing about my young pack members is, though they may battle me endlessly for the position of alpha, truthfully, they don't want it. What they really want is to have a strong leader which is why they constantly challenge the alphas. They want to know that their father and I deserve the respect they are going to give the people in charge. They want to know they can trust me with this position I've been given. If I'm weak and let them run over the top of me, let them rule the roost, then they know I'm an unfit leader. They would think I don't deserve respect and therefore they would give me none. They would believe I wouldn't be able to stick up for them because I couldn't even stand up to my own little pack.
I'm not saying I believe in ruling over your children as a tyrant. I'm saying you can be calm, firm, gentle, and strong at the same time. I try not to beg or bribe or plead with my children to behave and I believe they are better off for it. Oh yes, I swoon over and reward good behavior but I don't tolerate the pack rules being thrown helter-skelter due to a toddler's will.
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| Life is a journey. Eventually children will grow and carve their own path. But, while they are young, they look to their parents to guide them. They look to their parents to lead them. |
I've been given a great responsibility in preparing these future adults for life. This calling would be very difficult for me to complete of I were faint-hearted, hard-hearted, or even currently broken-hearted. It's for a person whose heart can handle being told by someone they've poured their life into "I hate you!" Someone who won't take it personally when they are challenged. Someone whose will won't quiver and break when a firm rule must be imposed on a misbehaving pup. Someone who is confident in who they are and has enough strength to establish a mighty pack.
So yes, I am mother, the alpha wolf.
(tantrum) photo credit: <a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/lovelornpoets/6792355531/">lovelornpoets</a> via <a href="http://photopin.com">photopin</a> <a href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0/">cc</a>
(wolf fight) photo credit: <a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/tambako/10039483454/">Tambako the Jaguar</a> via <a href="http://photopin.com">photopin</a> <a href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nd/2.0/">cc</a>
(little girl) photo credit: <a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/lulupine/447618298/">LuluP</a> via <a href="http://photopin.com">photopin</a> <a href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-nd/2.0/">cc</a>
(journey) photo credit: <a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/anabadili/3082839059/">.craig</a> via <a href="http://photopin.com">photopin</a> <a href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-nd/2.0/">cc</a>
(lone wolf) photo credit: <a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/ucumari/366089557/">ucumari</a> via <a href="http://photopin.com">photopin</a> <a href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-nd/2.0/">cc</a>
